Best In The World: Let’s Play Hakuoki: Kyoto Winds, Episode 68

Saito and Tails are leaving.

It’s not ALL bad news, though.

Itou is starting a group called the Guardians of the Imperial Tomb, and he’s taking some of the Shinsengumi with him. With the fact that we were lying to him about the immortal murder hobos we keep in the basement making him think he can’t trust us for some reason, we don’t have any ability to talk him into staying, though I’ll admit I don’t quite remember why we wanted him here in the first place. To keep him silent, Kondou agreed to let him take anyone from the Shinsengumi who wanted to leave with him. Among those leaving… Hajime Saito and Miles “Tails” Prower.

I need to speak to the soldiers here, and someone close to those who are leaving.

When what to my wondering eyes did appear / but a swole samurai, and his friend who is weird

Good, Sano doesn’t have to totally botch emptying his guts again, glad to hear it.

I ask them how they feel about Tails and Saito leaving.

Shin is MAD about it, Tails leaving without so much as a good-bye or an explanation. Sano talks him back down, that Tails clearly has his reasons, and he doesn’t make decisions like this on a whim. It’s impossible not to feel for them, but as someone on the outside, no matter how welcome they’ve made me feel, I can only sympathize. 

This takes me by surprise. What about Kondou? He seems just as sweet and forthright as the day I met him.

Seeing my lack of understanding (how he can tell it apart from my normal face is impossible to know), Shin continues. Kondou spends more and more of his time with the “bigwigs” at the shogunate, versus time with his men here, and he’s always been so soft on Itou, leading the newcomers to feel like they had the run of the place no matter what they did. Kondou’s lost touch with his men here, and unlike Hijikata, Kondou’s not bridging that gap. 

We’ll both cling to the silver lining, though, that Itou’s gone.

Sano, however, is concerned about seeing them again, and not in a social setting.

That opens them up to doing whatever their new backers want, and that can be deadly. Venture capital has always been a problem.

What if we have to fight them?

honey no

Oh thank heavens.

He trails off.

No one knows how to finish that sentence.

After a few minutes of silence, we separate.

There’s nothing to say.

Best In The World: Let’s Play Hakuoki: Kyoto Winds, Episode 67

I was, um, cleaning.

But before he could be executed he had to, uh, help out around the house some?

well we can’t very well do any cleaning unless first we make a mess, obvs

Itou doesn’t buy it. Weird, I know.

Oh good, Sanan’s here.

Oh fuck, Sanan’s here.

Shit shit shit. No one here except Kondou likes Itou, and thanks to me — correction, thanks to a guy coming to my room to stab me, which really isn’t my fault, victim blaming won’t be invented for at least fifty years — oh who am I kidding, men have been victim-blaming women for as long as men have wanted to not take any responsibility for their actions, which dates back to at least the first dude who rewrote Genesis to make everything totally not his idea — uh — right — thanks to Richard Stabbington, Itou knows the Furies are a thing, and he knows that Sanan’s alive, and now he’s going to learn WHY Sanan’s alive, and how that reflects on Kondou and Hijikata, and since that came from the shogunate and Itou’s an Imperialist that’s going to have its own repercussions that I don’t really understand all that well, but with everything happening now we don’t have time to really figure out a good story because no one rehearsed this ahead of time, we just thought that Itou going to bed early every night meant that Sanan and the Smash Brothers could have late-night adventures and go on blood runs to the fridge or something, and really, we fucked around and now we’re finding out, only if I’d had my way the fucking around would’ve been–

right right sorry sorry going

WHY IS HIS DOOR COVERED IN THE LOVE ANIMATION

Best In The World: Let’s Play Hakuoki: Kyoto Winds, Episode 66

It was a dark and stormy night.

Suddenly, a plot rang out!

yes this is plot

CAN I HAVE SOMETHING OTHER THAN PLOT PLEASE

One of the Furies is here, in my room, in the middle of the night, when I am alone, and if the plot had waited maybe two chapters I’d be really psyched about this. As it is, I want to yeet myself into a different game. Since I couldn’t do that, I needed to call for help, and maybe not get myself Ghostfaced in the process.

wat

self

we need to talk

very quickly

Look, yes, they’re all very handsome (except Tails) and charming (except Hijikata) and sweet (except Okita) and kind (except Okita) and compassionate (except Okita) and smart (…except Nagakura) but IF I DO NOT CALL FOR HELP I AM GOING TO GET GOT and then that’s ALSO going to spell disaster for the Shinsengumi, in that no one will play the rest of their game now that the least interesting person has been removed from the equation and all the beautiful men can just start making out all the time and — okay, self, that took a bit of a turn, but seriously, if we’re dead then we don’t get any of the fun, even the fun that exists solely in our heads, so can we at least agree to figure out what to do now and consider the immediate future once we know we have one?

Good? Good.

NOT GOOD

INCREDIBLY NOT GOOD

The survival instinct finally kicks in, and the entirely of existence gets filed under “someone else’s problem.”

The Fury gets up off of his hands and knees, my blood dribbling down his chin and splashing on the streaks in the floor, and finds me in the corner.

i’d rather not if it’s all the same to you

yes senpai

Hijikata heard me and came running to help.

He didn’t come alone.

The grim horror of dawning realization.

There is work to be done.

There is no joy to be found in it.

Four blades, one strike.

oh fuck you narration box